


Black Blaze

by kaibagirl



Series: Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition (S8) [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Death, Deception, Family, Forgiveness, Happy Ending, Regret, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:13:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23620624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaibagirl/pseuds/kaibagirl
Summary: Sirius blames himself for not being there for Regulus. However, Regulus feels the same.Will the brothers Black ever forgive each other, and themselves?
Series: Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition (S8) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1700263
Comments: 7
Kudos: 13





	Black Blaze

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gaby_Black](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaby_Black/gifts), [RiverFord](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiverFord/gifts).



> Prompts:
> 
> Fear: Deception
> 
> #2 {song} Go to War by Nothing more #6 {setting} Room of Requirement #12 {word} blaze

**_Blaze: 1. a very large or fiercely burning fire._ ** _Metaphorically, a huge argument._

_I don't know what you had in mind_

_But here we stand on opposing sides_

_Let's go to war_

_Let's go to war_

Be ready for the war, to seek peace.

Unfortunately, Regulus isn’t quite sure that he would ever _live_ to see peace.

He recalled a conversation.

_"I have committed some sins, but I am not a devil."_

_“We become what we think,” said Sirius._

_“Well I think I can save all of you, while you think I’m bad! What does that make you then?”_

_“What do you mean, save us? From what, your ugly face?”_

_“Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?”_

_Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth, and that is exactly what Sirius did. Regulus staggered back, rubbing at his lip. He raised his wand and sent a jinx flying at Sirius._

Regulus regretted that moment. Even during his final moments, he felt a horribly strong pain in his heart. He was slowly, painfully being dragged beneath the water by the Inferi, as he was dying of an unquenchable thirst.

Oh, but how he wished to apologize to his older brother, to hug him one last time. To confess.

Lack of air caused him to take a breath. Water filled his lungs. He saw a shattered light, dancing before him. It was rather like the color of Sirius’s eyes.

That was the last thing he saw before his vision turned black.

***

Man is nothing else, but what he makes of himself. Sirius thought he did a pretty good job. Handsome, charming, funny, perfect. Regulus, however, thought he was an arrogant git.

_“Don’t stand too close to me, babe. I, unlike you, am hot. Don’t you know plastic melts?” said Sirius._

_“You, unlike me, are an idiot,” replied Regulus, rolling his eyes._

_“Hark who’s talking.”_

_“You’re still just an uncultured swine to me.”_

_“Can’t come up with a better insult, I see."_

_"It'd be a shame to ruin that_ pretty _face of yours, as you say."_

_"Oh yeah? Punch me then."_

_"I don't have time for you. Just leave me alone."_

_"Coward, just like the rest of your house!"_

_"Sometimes, I wonder who's_ **really** _the coward."_

_With that said, Regulus walked away, leaving Sirius with another bitter insult left on the tip of his tongue._

***

Bitter are the wars between brothers. Especially when they never end.

A shaking Sirius Black sat on the floor of his small flat. Regulus, dead. Why? Why did he have to die now? Why didn't he, Sirius, die instead? He never apologized for the horrible, horrible things he said to his brother, his precious little brother. He didn't even get to say goodbye. As much as they fought, he still cared for his kin.

Sirius felt a throbbing headache coming on, as he remembered one of the many arguments he had with Regulus.

_“You uncultured swine,” said Regulus venomously._

_“Only my friends can call me that,” replied Sirius casually._

_“What, is that a law now?”_

_“At least I have friends, unlike you. Yours are all either imaginary, or stupid. Like Mulciber.”_

_“You have serious problems, my imaginary friend thinks.”_

_Your silence is the best way to judge your enemy. However, Sirius also makes faces._

_“Why are you making those faces at me?”_

_“Listen, I’m not responsible for what my face does when you talk.”_

_I will win this war_ , he thought at the time. How stupid he'd been. Regulus could have still been alive if only he'd been there for him. But he left him at the mercy of their parents, and later, Voldemort himself.

He never thought that his little brother would join Voldemort. But now, as he thought about it, it made complete sense.

Regulus had always wanted approval. His parents thought of him as a failure, before Sirius went to Hogwarts and turned into a blood traitor. After that, Regulus was 'loved'. Walburga and Orion Black put their hopes on him to continue their bloodline of purity.

But Regulus joined Voldemort to please his parents. And that was his downfall, the reason he died. With him died the hope of a pureblood grandchild, as Sirius was a blood traitor and wasn't included anymore.

Before all of that happened, Regulus was content with the love his older brother gave him.

If Sirius had a chance to change one thing of the past, it would be to keep Regulus close. Even if he was a Slytherin, Sirius should have kept his little brother close. If he did, Regulus wouldn’t have had to lie to him. How stupid he'd been.

If only he could turn back time...

***

**_Blaze: 2. used in various expressions of anger, bewilderment, or surprise as a euphemism for ‘hell’._ **

_Screaming at the ones we love_

_Like we forgot who we can trust_

_Screaming at the top of our lungs_

_On the grounds where we feel safe_

Love cannot save you from your own fate. However, Sirius wished he showed his brother more love. Alas, he realized that too late.

_“Why in blazes did you join Voldemort!?”_

_“Don’t speak the Dark Lord’s name.”_

_“I’ll do what I want!”_

_“Funny, I could say the same thing to you.”_

_“It’s better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.”_

_“I’m barely living, Sirius!”_

How hadn’t he noticed that his brother was hiding something?

He should have known then, but he was blind. Blinded by hate.

***

There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. And that is what Regulus did.

That’s what he was to Sirius—a nothing. Nothing but a traitor, the bad guy.

Regulus wished so badly he could tell his brother about his plans, to be open with him. But he couldn’t, and that’s why he was a nothing.

***

One of Regulus's worst memories is Sirius laughing and joking with his friends.

Seeing him happy wasn't what hurt; in fact, Regulus was very glad his brother found happiness. What hurt was Sirius pushing him away. Even if it was partly his fault.

_“You have begun to speak with a commoner’s tongue, brother,” said Regulus._

_“That’s not all I’ve done with a ‘commoner’s’ tongue, brother,” replied Sirius, smirking._

_“You should be ashamed of yourself.”_

_“You and dear old mum and dad are already doing that_ **for** _me.”_

***

_Sirius was in his room, shaking from tears as the insults his parents screamed at him echoed in his ears. A spider walked on the floor. He stood up, terrified. As the spider got closer, he snatched up a magazine and squashed it. He started sobbing again. What if he became like his parents? What he did to the spider reminded him of Walburga's punishments. He remembered the fear he had when she struck him. Was that how the spider felt?_

From then on, he vowed to never kill an innocent. **_Ever_ ** again.

His brother was innocent. He'd been heavily influenced by his parents, determined to make them proud. Sirius let him die.

***

**_Blaze: 3. To burn fiercely or brightly._ **

_You've got my heart and I've got your soul_

_But are we better off alone?_

_With every battle, we lose a little more_

_Remember everything that we died for_

_You are everything that I die for_

_A terrified young Regulus ran into his older brother’s bedroom, closing the door._

_Sirius looked up from his magazine. “Reg? What’s wrong?”_

_“T-there’s a spider in my room.”_

_Sirius tried not to chuckle._

_“Show me.”_

_He does. The tiny thing had made its home in the window, still spinning and weaving its web._

_“It’s tiny Reg, it can’t hurt you.”_

_“B-but I don’t like spiders.”_

_“It’s more scared of you than you are of it. Imagine something way bigger than you approaching. Imagine the fear as it tries to kill you. That’s how the spider is feeling.”_

Afterwards, Regulus never harmed a spider again. Sirius was glad he had at least one positive influence on his brother.

***

Sirius fell through the veil. He was going to join two of his brothers. The thought made him smile wider than his last laugh.

He was going to see _James_ , his best mate, a second brother. He is going to apologize to him and Lily for letting them die, for not being careful enough, for being naive. For being stupid.

He was going to see his precious little brother.

He could finally apologize to him. He could make things right.

As his life flashed through his eyes, he cried. So many mistakes, so many mess ups. So much _stupidity_.

Sirius woke up, in the Room of Requirement, dressed in clean white clothes. He saw a mirror on the wall. Looking into it, he saw that he looked younger, handsomeness restored, like he had never gone to Azkaban, never experienced the things he did.

He sat up, looking around. Memories, in the form of pictures, hung everywhere. Crimson red decor. It rather resembled his room in Number 12 Grimmauld Place, but it was different.

It had a happier vibe, it was cleaner, warmer.

Sirius got up slowly from the soft, carpeted floor.

"Padfoot! Turn around, mate!" shouted an excited voice behind him. Could it be..?

Sirius turned around.

"Prongs!" He exclaimed. James greeted him with a huge bear hug.

"I missed you mate," said James, refusing to let go of him.

"I missed you too James, you have no idea how much. I'm so s-" Sirius was cut off by a pretty redhead entering the Room.

"You got any hugs for me?" Lily asked, beautiful green eyes sparkling. She held her arms wide open. James let go of Sirius, and hugged her immediately.

"Lily, I didn't know you missed me that much. We just saw each other like 2 minutes ago!" joked James. She rolled her eyes, and he let go a moment later.

Sirius hugged her tight, sobbing into her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, I failed you both. I'm not asking for forgiveness, I don't deserve it, I just want you to know that I am really, really sorr-" Sirius was cut off by Lily squeezing the air out of him with the power of her hug.

He felt another pair of arms from behind. James, he thought fondly.

"You couldn't have known, none of us expected it. It's not your fault," said Lily.

Sirius opened his mouth to speak, but then he looked over Lily’s shoulder and noticed a figure hovering by the door.

It was Regulus.

They locked eyes, and Sirius immediately let go of Lily. Regulus tentatively entered the Room, as Sirius started walking toward him.

  
They met halfway. Awkward silence filled the air.

To Sirius’s surprise, Regulus kneeled down at his feet.

“Forgive me brother. If I had realized the Dark Lord’s plans sooner, I would have joined and fought with you until my last breath. I truly am sorry,” said Regulus, voice filled with sorrow.

Sirius dropped to the floor.

“No, I’m supposed to be apologizing to you! The things I said, absolutely unforgivable. Instead of ridiculing you, I should have been guiding you! I should have helped you and—and oh Regulus, I am so, so sorry. I don’t deserve forgiveness, I—” Sirius was cut off once again, but this time by his brother hugging him tight.

For a moment, Sirius didn’t know what to do. The last time they embraced was so long ago. After five heartbeats passed, Sirius slipped his arms around Regulus’s slim shoulders.

They stayed like that for another five heartbeats, until they heard whispering behind them.

The two brothers hastily let go of each other, standing up.

Then, Sirius remembered they were apparently in the Room of Requirement. He closed his eyes, asking the Room to give him and his brother some privacy. As much as he missed James and Lily, he needed to make things right with his brother.

The Room obliged.

Regulus didn’t question it, instead choosing to lead his brother over to a sofa that the Room conjured.

As soon as the two were seated, Regulus started talking

“Did Kreacher tell you what I did?” he asked, with blazing eyes looking into his brother’s.

“No, he didn’t,” replied Sirius.

“I found out that the Dark Lord—,” Regulus was cut off.

“Call him Voldemort, it’s his name,” said Sirius.

“No, it’s Tom Riddle, actually. Tom **_Marvolo_ ** Riddle,” replied Regulus.

As Sirius’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, Regulus took advantage of his momentary shock and spoke again.

“Anyway, **_Tom_ ** wants to be immortal. He split his soul in two, and made a Horcrux,” Regulus was talking faster as he saw that Sirius wanted to interrupt again. “At least, I **_think_ ** he split it in two, now that I think of it he probably made more and I just didn’t find out about them. One day, he asked if he could borrow Kreacher. Naturally, I said yes. It turns out that Tom took him to some sort of island, and forced him to drink cursed water in order to test the barriers protecting a bit of his soul, that **_now_ ** resides inside of Salazar Slytherin’s locket,” he stopped, waiting for Sirius to absorb the new information.

“So, you went there? How did Kreacher survive the cursed water?” asked Sirius.

“I summoned him back home, and gave him normal water. That was the cure. And yes, I asked Kreacher to take me to the island.”

“Why did you die if the cure was water?”  
  


“I… I drank the cursed water instead of Kreacher. I didn’t want him to suffer again…”

“So why didn’t he just give you water then?”

“I ordered him to take the locket, switch it with a fake, and leave me. I told him to try everything to break it.”

Sirius looks at him with wide eyes. “If I… If I had been kinder to Kreacher, I would have known how brave you were. How brave you **_are_**. You’re a hero, Reggie,” he said, smiling softly. “I’m really sorry.”

“I am too, brother, I hope you can forgive me, in time.”

“I’ve already forgiven you.”

Regulus smiled, eyes blazing. “And I you.”

The flames of anger had been quenched. They can start again. No more deception necessary, they could be open with each other, without being frowned upon by their family.

The war is over, and they came back home, back to each other.


End file.
